How to Trust your own Process…

How many of us want to have our entire life under control?

Do you think a lot about how things would be in your “perfect world”?

Of course. We work tirelessly to try and create the life that we feel we deserve.

But HOW deep have you reflected on your life, confirming that you are pursuing the life destined for YOU?

I’ve noticed people tend to follow others dreams, goals and accomplishments. There is a overwhelming lack of originality when it comes people living their own lives.

We look at another’s persons “happiness” and try and follow that person’s specific journey to achieve the same results. That is an impossible task as far as I’m concerned.

Each and every one of our journeys are different. We have what we call Values which is our inner feelings of how and what we want in our individual lives.

Living for yourself requires constant self evaluation. We must keep within what it is we want in our own lives and be prepared to endure a journey thats different from the next person.

Your life is not supposed to be the same as another. Individual growth is the cycle you have to embrace. Becoming confident in your decision making, moving unapologetically in your best interest, and trusting your own process are major keys in creating the life you really want.

Your life is unique to you. Trusting your own process creates positive levels of self confidence that can’t be obtained from anyone else.

Believe in yourself and know that what is meant for you will happen. Consistency, dedication and a never wavering desire to succeed will ensure that you create a life that you want wholeheartedly.

Your Journey is your journey and it will always be necessary.

Want more info on how to become unapologetic in creating your new Reality? Schedule your free chat right here: https://go.oncehub.com/ClarityChat

ยฉ๏ธ Upgraded MindsetZ 2021

My Vision is forming

I carried this in silence for a long time because the environments I used to be around didn’t get it. My vision, and the purpose behind it.

This Event is another step in the direction of my purpose.

All women should be confident, full of self love and always motivated for success.

We are virtually getting together and going to talk about ALL things women improvement, inspirational and empowering. Stories of triumph, lessons learned and just all around dope girl MAGIC.

We having our very own Superbowl Empowerment party right on our computer screens and phones! Mark your calenders!

Coach Kay Wds

Get serious…

It’s time yall….

Even though I have not really touched on politics through this whole “political madness” ( in my words), I have to get this off my chest.

I see and hear so many people talking,ย  arguing, and I mean heated debates. I just would like to know when it became so critically “unjust” to have a different voice or opinion than someone else.

This is the time where I feel being yourself should matter the MOST. Does this woman here particularly care for the current climate of our country? Absolutely NOT….but since I can’t just walk and turn off the madness switch, I chose to initiate what I needed to do for ME. Staying true to SELF is so important y’all. We have to remember noone else can take care of us better than ourselves. It is mandatory to make sure you are functioning with a level head, solid choices, and no regrets! You failed at something? Ok…take the lesson from it and keep going!

I never thought that I would see anything like this going on in my lifetime. You have to really get serious folks about your OWN life..I feel like some people are literally sitting around waiting on politics to decide how to live day to day. Why haven’t you already had a plan in place for your life anyway? I know the importance of elections, politics, education, etc don’t get me wrong. But let me ask this: what is it going to take for you to get real serious about your life ad a whole?

I’m taking it serious enough to make the changes in life for ME and my legacy, yes I can still create one and I am! Broadened my Coaching, creating multiple streams of income, able to shift the mindset to stay focused no matter what. Nothing will get in my way when it comes to where my Purpose is shifting me.

It is not too late for anyone. There should be no election, no opinion, NOTHING should be restricting you on making the necessary UPgrade in life you know deep down you seek….

Monday Reflection…..

Really happening yall…

I want to reflect a little bit today.

Reflecting this morning, I sit and think I didn’t always know which way I was going. Up until even last year, I would go through negative times and situations, and thought that living that way was normal, going day to day just dealing with it because my mind was programmed to believe I was supposed to.

Constantly being plagued with blocked thoughts and bad habits, as well as feeling obligated and disposable to others bad patterns too. Putting myself off constantly, not even having time to figure out myself mentally, spiritually, and emotionally caused a serious crack within.

That “crack” was the modification that my mind subconsciously was telling me was needed. The underlying rainbow and ray of light I needed to make my SHIFT. My Self Love Journey was no longer an option to begin if I wanted to continue to live.

Shift, Focus, TAKE OFF!

The next chapter of #LifeCoachKayWds is currently in process. A weekend meeting has opened up a door and opportunity that I honestly did not anticipate or even see coming. I have not even been able to sleep right because of the sheer excitement!

I am a living witness and testament to say: THAT MINDSET SHIFT is required to change the game. No exception to the rules.

Your dreams can happen. You can achieve each and every goal, accomplishment, or task that you desire. I am doing just that.

Having released negative thoughts I once had and pushed onto others, it cleared the road to take the path set forth for me unapologetically.

Self assurance, a positive support system, and the continued shift to a self love filled, abundant life are keys that will keep me on the trail to my true destiny.

FULL SPEED AHEAD! Stay tuned for the Continuation of my Journey.

Shift the reaction….

We all have it in us to be the best version or ourselves….which REQUIRES ourย SELF motivation to be great within….the Journey is Necessary….

Continue reading “Shift the reaction….”

Mornin Session..

a Mind shuffle….

Ask yourself what is it that you firmly seek in your individual mind?

Are you or have you been easily or heavily influenced by others thoughts on something you wanted?

Have you make ever made your decision(s) about something and then second guess because of the negative opinion of another?

I have always maintained a certain level of confidence, so I thought. There were times that I could be locked in on a decision, then one comment from someone else could literally have me back at square one with the whole situation. Why did it happen?

Whether we want to believe it or not, as individuals, there are some who tend to reside in their lives based on others think they should live. Having divergent paths and procedures for the “different” seems to be viewed in a negative aspect. These negative patterns that are thrown to one another create restriction and small havoc unnecessarily. This is likely to be one of multiple reasons we suppress our true thoughts, the ones we desperately want to bring to the forefront. Seeing and being surrounded with many different beliefs, core values, and systems in place, the true struggle seems to be finding what YOURS are.


That was ME. I seem to have struggled with the common core beliefs of society. Restricted and quite frankly, lazy to the lesson. This mind of mine always has busted out the “but what if” factor. Meaning, I didn’t want to necessarily agree and accept something just because it is what someone else chose to. But i surpressed it for not wanting to be in conflict with someone else. Why should I though? We are supposed to have a mind of our own….and I have since taken a personal vow to my higher self, that I will be applying and embracing my life unapologetically how I see fit…..end of story.

Why follow someone else’s version of YOUR way of life, when you feel it in your soul that it is not for you? Make no more excuses for seeking and achieving total clarity…FOR YOU…

The Journey is Necessary…..

Keep Going…..

I know that I have been talking ALOT about being positive and changing your Mindset to reflect it. However I KNOW that we are all human and that there can be slip ups.

Everyone has a bad day. Everyone goes through unforseen situations. When I speak about positive and the way my mind now operates, its the choice I make HOW I handle life’s hard balls.

Gone are the days of me dragging negative minded situations out. Finished are the days of me “elaborating” heavily and on and on about how something has affected me and my situations in a negative light. I am over the days of reacting as well as done reciprocating to a situation in a negative manner.

Sometimes silence is the best thing when you are dealing with others and their negative attributes. I learned to pick my battles at the start so that way I already know what I will and will not even address.

Even on my bad days, guess what? It will still be a good day. You know why? My plans are still in motion, my focus and purpose for good is still here strongly, front and center.

A small hurdle, distraction, or negative feedback should NEVER stop the Purpose you have from the beginning! Expect that those bad shifts can and may happen, and that will and should make it just that much easier to handle them positively and KEEP GOING!

One Decision..

There was a time not that long ago would have seen or heard this message, and wouldn’t of even given it a second glance or thought.

However, crazy and unsure times had put so many different perspectives on my brain.

This right here is something everyone really needs to “let sink in”. We cannot keep thinking that things are just going to change without putting forth any effort for the changes we seek for our better selves.

You want great self change? Craving better choices with a certain situation? Are are seeking to get off of the “negative train” when it comes to making choices in your life?

One decision……MAKE IT HAPPEN!ย  You are the only thing in your way. Get your stuff in order, your MINDSET is depending on YOU….

Whatever path you are on, it is never too late to shift it for positive evolving. Do not think that you are not able to modify your life for the better NOW at this present moment. Even after reading this….

Get in touch with your TRUE SELF. That reflection should want you to be better for yourself.ย  Make the decision to mentally Upgrade for self improvement and true changes.

Your Journey is Necessary,ย  I will say it everyday until it is understood. Mine was, and always will be……

Delete the bad thoughts…

When will you be ready?

How many more things have to go wrong in the things in your life?

How many times does that toxic relationship come back again and again with the same results from the last 15 times?

How many more times are your going to keep asking yourself “why is this happening to me now “?

As many times that you keep thinking that you can live abundant and blessed with those Negative Mental blocks…..That MIND has to shift….the Mental Mindset has to be in a positive space. Anything you think about, attempt to achieve, want to accomplish, or even goal setting,, will NOT happen the way you want with a negative Mindset…..IT IS NOT POSSIBLE folks…

The Journey is Necessary…..

Don’t apologize…

Don’t apologize for wanting to live for you….

Don’t apologize for those that you have to leave behind mentally….

Don’t apologize for understanding that in order to level up to where you want to be, that hard changes and adjustments have to happen….

Don’t apologize for wanting complete clarity in your life, even if that involves reviewing your beliefs and changing them….

Don’t apologize for setting your boundaries for other people.

Don’t apologize for implementing the shift in your mindset.

Don’t apologize for wanting to be a overall better person…

Don’t apologize for understanding that you may need guidance to embrace the positive life and balance you want to achieve.

Dont apologize for your UPgraded Mindset…..start your journey, start living freely, start creating your positive mental being….

Don’t apologize……

A Lil’ Reflection…

Sitting here at home today, I sit here and reflect on how “settled” I am at this moment. I have come a long damn way…LOL. I mean, A LONG WAY! I think back on when my breaking point was. Listen, that period was a different type of experience.

An exhausted, burned out, debilitated breaking point type of experience. It had become critical for me to begin the shift of my mind and actions. My clarity depended on it……

Once my shift began, Putting this to “paper” was another uncomfortable shift for me, but I had to realize my focus for inspiring and motivating also included telling my story and embracing the writing world as well.

As a woman, a woman who has endured, seen, listened and encountered a lot of situations some of us women deal with or have dealt with on a Mental Mindset level, relating to different encounters, mistakes, not so good judgement decisions, we encounter and deal with, and can ALSO relate to the negative mechanisms some women commonly concede to go with as a response to negative situations.     

 I used to be one who didn’t share any negative, hell ANY of my personal stuff to those outside of my close circle, simply because I just didn’t want to. Even those close to me didn’t know  100% of things that went on in this overacting Gemini mind.     

 It really feels good to utilize writing to open up about myself honestly.  Some feel conscience stricken to always have to be fully capable and โ€œon top of their shitโ€ without missing a beat. Some have been taught and shown to believe that we should just keep problems and struggles to ourselves in this society and just let your mental fall to the waist side, even when you are not at your best because of it! It is time to change the narrative when it comes to our Mental Mindset.

Simple beginning: Creating a positive mindset should have you wanting to create a positive space in your head. Building a peaceful Mindset that is created to give you a sense of calming, clarity and positive feels, if only for that one moment in the beginning. Then ask yourself, why would you not want to feel that way all the time? 

I will say it every time. Your journey is necessary.

How is this Justified?

I usually try not to speak on celebrities and their lives. Even though they tend to have very public lives for whatever they are famous for, I have always taken the notion that they indeed should have private matters stay private as they are human just like me. I know that is a stretch as people say all the time, “that is the life they chose”. Not to me. They chose a life of entertainment, Movies, music, etc. They did NOT choose for their private affairs in their lives be opted for all to see and scrutinize. However, that is not the reason for this post today.

I have seen multiple tweets, posts and conversations about Meg thee Stallion here in the last day or so. She was shot a few weeks or maybe a month or so ago ( I don’t keep up). I browsed multiple news sites about it vaguely, as I have been successfully trying to maintain a low stress, positive minded life. While the news and entertainment articles are all pretty much reporting the same thing with regards to the alleged incident, the “comments” from fans and outside people, males and females, have almost made me sick to my stomach.

If what Meg states is true, why are people labeling her as a “snitch”? It saddens me so much to see people really saying how she should NOT have spoken out against someone who may have committed a violent act against her. They were apparently somewhat dating or in some type of relationship, which makes it a domestic situation. Domestic Violence is not OK!

If this woman was shot as a result of a domestic dispute, I’m bothered that some people are justifying it! That is not being a snitch, It is called IDENTIFYING YOUR ABUSER! Just based off of countless polls, statistics and any other thing you would like to research, women are already terrified to come forward against their abuser. One reason is the backlash they receive from the abusers supporters, as well as the lies, deceptive practices and lack of admitting guilt from abuser themselves, which seems to be this situation.

I had been in a domestic abuse relationship once in my life. Looking back on it, I was made to feel that those type of relationships were “the norm”. Back then I was scared to speak my truth about it. I chose to be silent back then. I was mentally programmed to believe that no one was going to try and help me as I would have to deal with it alone. I was such a strong person on the outside to others when in this relationship. I probably never even looked or acted like someone in a abusive relationship and worked hard to keep it that way. I fought with him, I dealt with coming home from hanging out with friends to being strip searched at the door and told I smelled like ” a man’s cologne.” and questioned why. I went through the interrogation of him going through my phone, asking about phone numbers, why I was on the phone for however long I may have been on a call. Getting hit with a hammer in my legs for not “giving sex” when he wanted it. Those are just SOME of the things. Only my close friends knew about this toxic relationship AFTER it was over, and let me tell you, that was hard to disclose then. Circumstances took him out of my life (he went to jail for drugs). I was devastated that he got locked up but after some months, I knew that it was my sign to end all dealings, no more communication, no more anything. That is HARD to do Psychologically, especially if your Mental is not strong enough, no matter what anyone thinks or say IT JUST IS NOT THAT EASY to walk away when your mindset is not in tact. That is just not up for debate for me.

There is NEVER a reason to condone domestic abuse. EVER. I say this from BOTH aspects as it is never OK to put your hands on ANYONE without being provoked or defending yourself. This subject is still sensitive to this day for me. I used to try and deter the thoughts, or keep scrolling when I seen something about domestic abuse on social media. Dealing with and trying to walk away from domestic abuse is so different for each and every individual. That fight to break free mentally, physically and emotionally is a fight that you have to muster the strength to do, no matter what obstacles come in the way. Hard, YES, Worth the fight? Absolutely!!!

One HUGE reason I began my official coaching journey is for empowerment of Women. I’m creating a platform for women who feel that they are stuck in their lives and have no where to turn mentally. For whatever reason a person reaches out for help, the first step is done….REACHING OUT! My platform will always be for us women who have been told they are unworthy, who feel they are lacking the tools and strengths to overcome any negative mental blockages, negative mindset and thinking patterns. There are so may reasons that we women are afraid of change. I want that barrier broken. I want women to know that you can do this! You can live a positive life, you can be blessed beyond measure. The Mindset takes work to get it there and my services are available to any women who wants to begin that journey to a positive mental well being.

If you are in domestic abusive situation, please think about seeking help with ANYONE you think may give you the support and strength to walk away. It is not going to change, they ARE going to do it again, they do NOT love you, there ARE other people that want whats best for you, no matter what your abuser tells you. Please seek guidance From someone. There are still some who want to see all women winning!! My email is open for any woman who doesn’t know where to begin that journey…….

You are working SIS…..

My reflections today put a big cheesy kid smile on my face! Now don’t get me wrong, I smile everyday as I know I am blessed, however this smile is a little bigger today.

This week so far has been pretty constant and busy for me, In a GREAT WAY!  Having several separate sessions with a few of my clients who have all given me awesome news with regards to things going on in their lives! Great things are happening for them, as they are opening up their mind and embracing the blessings that they are manifesting! They are UPGRADING their Mindset!!! Putting themselves and their goal oriented mental ahead of the negative thoughts that have restricted them before working with me! They are embracing the fact that Positive thoughts create positive living!

We often allow the word of others,  fear of change and a host of other negative thoughts to prevent us from accomplishing the things we want out of life. I myself had those thoughts before beginning my own journey, but I have overcome them and embraced the world as a motivational Coach for my fellow Women. We tend to wonder and worry about what others are going to say about out thoughts and ideas. Even when you have acquired goals and achievements and want to be happy for yourself,  you may still wonder about others opinion about YOU. STOP THAT! Your dreams are YOUR DREAMS. Your goals are YOUR Goals. GET THEM! ACHIEVE THEM! My clients are all now getting to the point where they are making THEMSELVES priority and it is showing! They are getting their Confidence and Mindset to the positive point where nothing or no one will be able to deter them. They are acquiring the strength and drive to get and STAY FOCUSED. Their dedication to their-selves is more driven since beginning their journey with me, they speak positivity into their lives and now understand that everything great that they want to happen in their lives will because of THEM….they have accepted Accountability for things they may not have before, realizing that closure in certain situations and circumstances are not required to move forward with a positive mental mindset. They are now achieving the Clarity and Mental Peace and Prosperity that they may not have even gotten without some assistance and guidance from having their Motivational partner, advisor, and Coach by their side.

I love what I do. I am still on my own journey.  I will always have a journey. My journey will always be POSITIVE! My mindset is so positively STRONG. My focus is even stronger.  I believe in myself. My clients believe in me. My desire is magnified. My vision is clear. I have long ago stopped worrying about what others thought negatively and have put the focus on assisting those who want the tools for an UPgraded Mental Being.  This is just the beginning!

A huge shout out to my Clients! I am proud of each one of you. You are here, You are positive,  you are focused and your work is starting to pay off!! It is only up from here……and with the Upgraded Mindset you are getting, nobody can and will be able to stop you! Much love to you beautiful ladies….let’s keep working!!

Why does their opinion matter?

Only your opinion matters

So often when I talk to people here lately,  conversations come up talking about how the way OTHERS think about their  situations. They vent about how it is affecting their way of thinking, which is  interfering with them making lasting even lifetime decisions for themselves.


I know that society has somewhat pivoted the mindset to think that other people opinions matter when it comes to our own lives. It is easier for us to listen to them which means we stall on our dreams, quit our goals prematurely,  say we can’t do something cause of what someone ELSE thinks. If we didn’t want it, it wouldn’t be on your MIND. It would have never been a dream, an aspiration.  You want it, right?  So why are you allowing others to dictate your drive and ambition? A person/friend that is truly supportive will NOT allow you to hinder yourself because of their own reservations with themselves….you don’t want ANYONE in your life who tells you that your dreams should wait, that its not a good idea, etc.  You don’t need someone in your ear telling you that you can’t do something. You need POSITIVE REINFORMENT! You really have everything to prove to YOURSELF and yourself ONLY!! Your shine is for YOU. Show yourself that you are capable. They can see your success from back there….wayyyy back….

YOUR MIND AND OPINION IS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS….its time to LIVE FOR YOU!!! TAKE THAT CHANCE…the only regret you will have is that you listened to them….๐Ÿ’ฏ

Need guidance when figuring things out? I’m here…. Ourupgradedmindsetz@gmail.com

Keep Striving…..

As a Coach who is just putting herself out to the world, these words came right on time! My Journey had to be known so that others can see that we can change our mindset for POSITIVE forever! I know in my heart each and every time I post, comment, or share something my intention is to INSPIRE….. I know there are those who are quietly supportive, which is great as well, but more importantly I KNOW that my words will assist and even guide ONE person to change their mindset, if only for that moment. MY GOAL IS FOR A PERMANENT UPGRADED MENTAL BEING FOR ALL WOMEN…..I will continue my passion, my drive, my focus and my VISION….our journey is so necessary !!๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’ž๐Ÿ’ฏ

It’s OK to ask…

When is the last time you sat and just gave your life a COMPLETE evaluation?

Complete meaning physically and more importantly, MENTALLY?

How many of us actually sit and think about our mental health and well being at any given moment?

I reviewed a few articles such as the information being provided by the CDC about how EVERYONE reacts differently to stressful situations. The times that we are living in at this present moment are NOWHERE near the norm. Times are truly testing everything about us mentally whether we want to believe it or not.

According to Nature.com, Women are most affected by pandemics โ€” lessons from past outbreaks. Current events would and has tested each one of our mental capacity in some what shape or form.

Some have been able to keep it together for the most part.

Others are more heightened with emotions. These are crazy time folks. You want to implement something a little bit different for sake of your mind. It’s ok to understand the same routine may not be working anymore.

Different times calls for different methods of coping and mind control. Be ok with talking to someone about different emotions, feelings or thoughts that you’re experiencing. It is OK to seek coaching for guidance on becoming accountable, replacing negative thoughts and positive growth! Coaching is something that is being welcomed at all levels business and even personal levels and is more utilized more than we think…99% of women that have tried services have said it had a positive impact on their lives and would and HAVE Made it apart of their lives….


www.cdc.gov CDC



Very important to KEEP your MENTAL on point! Once your mind gets focused, you have to KEEP IT FOCUSED. Your success depends on it!๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ’ช๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ’ฏ


This message touched my soul….. Someone posted this on Facebook today and this message is a whole vibe! THIS! is what I envision for women as a whole. I dream of the day when us women become so confident and strong minded WITHIN ourselves as well as FOR ourselves. My goal in Coaching is to share and convey to each and every one of my past, present and future clients that a confident, upgraded mindset is attainable and sustainable for the long term. Women have put our own emotions on the back burner and made hold their own issues to themselves, being complacent with our own lives because it didn’t fit someone ELSE’S. I was guilty of that for many years…..helping people because I loved doing it, but losing my self in the process. NOW I AM PRIORITY. Once I began the necessary work to get my MINDSET in order, everything else began to get so easier. No stressing over simple, trivial, quickly to forget situations. I’m now able to stay completely focused on what it is I want and what I’ve manifested into my life thus far! I have launched a platform to allow women to be able to open up and be guided to live in their complete truth. I think different. I Act different. I WORK different.

I AM DIFFERENT. I have created an UPGRADED way of thinking for myself, which in turn is upgrading my way of life…..I’m only just beginning…..this journey is necessary and so is yours!

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